Today I am calling out some of my fellow veteran homeschoolers. I am asking you all to give a little bit of grace. Grace to the parents that have suddenly found themselves guiding their children’s education from home. Grace to those that you don’t consider real homeschoolers.
Today I feel the need to bring this to light. This morning I saw a tweet from another homeschool blogger. The gist of the tweet said that if you are doing a virtual public school at home, you should stop referring to yourself as a homeschooler. I have actually seen this sentiment expressed many times over the last few months within several homeschooling groups. Today I am saying, stop. Stop being the homeschool police. Stop telling people not to call themselves homeschoolers. Just stop. Then give a little grace. It goes a long way.
A New Trend
As a second generation homeschooler, I can say that this attitude toward people that choose publicly funded, virtual school options is a new trend. I grew up in a military family, which means that I lived and homeschooled in several different states. There were always a handful of families in our homeschool communities that chose to use the public school at home curriculum. Yes, even before the internet, there were public school at home options. The families that chose this option had varying reasons for doing so. In all of these situations, I can honestly say that these families were never accused of not being real homeschoolers. Every single family made the sacrifice to educate their children at home. Just like so many families are doing right now.
How Should We Define Homeschooling?
Is real homeschooling defined by a certain curriculum? The answer to that is no. It just takes a quick Google search to see that there are many, many homeschool curriculum publishers out there. They each follow a different style, scope, and sequence. So, the curriculum we use doesn’t define real homeschooling.
Do we define homeschooling by whether or not the education is publicly funded? There are several states where homeschoolers have access to public funds to purchase curriculum. California has been giving homeschoolers access to funding through charter schools for years. Alaska has a program to give homeschoolers access to public funding for their homeschools. Are homeschoolers in California and Alaska not real homeschoolers? I would say where the funding comes from is probably not what defines real homeschooling. The public funds come from our taxes anyway.
If it is not curriculum or funding, what defines real homeschooling? Is it just a legal definition or a matter of legal accountability? This seems like a strong argument on the surface. Students that are enrolled in public virtual schools are not legally defined as homeschoolers. I get this argument. On the other hand, I’m not legally defined as a homeschooler either. In my state, I have the option of enrolling my kids in an independent or umbrella school. My boys are legally defined as being enrolled in a private school. This is a pretty common choice for homeschoolers here, and we don’t get called out and told we are not real homeschoolers. As far as legal accountability, all homeschoolers are subject to the laws of the state where they reside. Some states require more accountability than others, but we are all subject to state laws.
I would dare to say that homeschooling should be defined as parents making a choice to invest their time and energy into schooling their kids at home. That’s it. Done. That is homeschooling in a nutshell. Parents that choose to use a virtual school option are doing just that. Is it the way I would choose to homeschool? No, I like more flexibility than virtual schools provide. I also don’t enroll my kids in online, teacher-directed homeschool classes for the same reason. It is a matter of preference.
What Grace Looks Like
I am going to reiterate what I said earlier. Let’s give a little grace. If you are not sure what that looks like, have no fear, I am here to help you out.
Here’s a scenario where you can practice grace. A parent on a homeschool Facebook group mentions they are struggling with homeschooling, then you find out they are talking about a public virtual school. Here is what grace looks like: “I am sorry you are struggling right now. Virtual schools can be difficult because there isn’t much flexibility. If you would like to look into some other homeschooling options I would be happy to help you with that.” If you are struggling with this concept of grace right now, feel free to copy and paste that response.
Here is what grace does not look like: “Stop calling yourself a homeschooler. You shouldn’t be in this group because you aren’t a homeschooler.” If this is the only response you can come up with, move on without responding.
Here’s another scenario for you. A friend announces they have made the decision to bring their child home this year and use a public virtual school option. Here’s a graceful response: “Good job mama! You are doing a great thing investing in your child by guiding their education at home. Let me know if I can help you get your school space set up. I can also give you a list of my favorite homeschool supplies that make my life easier.” Again, feel free to copy and paste this response.
Here’s what not to say: “Don’t call yourself a homeschooler. That’s not homeschooling.” Once again, if this is the only response you can come up with, move on without saying anything.
If you wake up in the morning and feel the need to tweet something homeschool related, try this: “Have a great homeschool day, friends!” This is full of grace and won’t inspire any long blog posts like this one.
Homeschooling is not an elite club whose members have to meet certain criteria to join. Many of these virtual schooling parents never imagined they would be educating their children at home. None of us expected to have our kids home all of last spring. As homeschoolers, we all use different curriculum and methods of instruction. Not everyone has to homeschool the way we do. Let’s be helpful. Let’s give a little grace to our fellow home educators.
If you are a new homeschooler, virtual schooler, unschooler, whatever you may call yourself, you are welcome here! If you need any help or advice, or if virtual schooling ends up not working for you, I am happy to help you find something that works. You can email me or connect with me on Facebook and I will do my best to respond (with grace).